PBS and VOTST calculations

Just like the jerkstores at The Society for American Baseball Research, I too like to make up new statistics that back up my claims. So while everyone spent their Memorial Day watching the Jays Royals game, I met with a group of virgins and nerds, uhhh I meant mathematicians, to finalize my new Horse betting formulas.

Guys who helped me with my formula

Please note the use of the term “Horse Betting” as opposed to “Handicapping” because I have two legs.

At the end of each weekend my time at the track will be justified through:

PBS – PONY BETTING SALARY (Amount of money I would’ve earned yearly if all my time was devoted to horse betting)

And

VOTST (Value Of Time Spent at Track)

Both of these combine to create an index figure called “Devoted Energy Gambling Everything and Not Enjoying life RATE” also know as DEGENERATE

Here is how PBS is calculated

Total Profit Earned \ Hours Spent at the Track = Y

Y x 40 = Z

Z x 52 = PBS

Later on I will try and factor in benefits and stock options into the equation but we decided to keep it simple for now

So for this past weekend here were my total 3 day earnings

Emerald Downs: 74.20 (FRI 29.90 SAT -0.25 SUN 44.55)
Hollywood Park: 214.30 (FRI 87.35 AT 127.95 SUN -1.00)
Hastings: 50.20 (SAT 4.00 SUN 46.20)

Total Weekend Profit: 338.70 (my calculations from yesterday was $1 off)
Time Spent at Track: 15 hours (FRI 4 hours SAT 5 hours SUN 6 hours)

Y = 22.58

22.58 x 40 = 903.2
903.2 x 52 = 46, 966

Therefore my PBS is 46,966 That would be my yearly salary in Canadian dollars if I devoted all my time towards Horse Betting. Not bad eh!

Here is how VOTST is calculated, now this formula is a little bit more complicated and I would be shot if I revealed all of it.

Basically its my total profit earned at the track over money spent on other things that don’t involved betting or N

So here is how I would’ve spent my money over hanging out at the track

FRIDAY

Semi decent bottle of wine 12.00
New Pack of Candles 2.50
Renting Season 1 of Sex and the City to prep for the release of the movie 12.00
Paying a someone to rent it for me to save embarrassment 5.00
Paying that person not to tell anyone else 20.00
Pop Corn 1.00

SATURDAY

Groceries 25.00
Hanging out at a Commercial Drive coffee shop to look cool and people watch 4.00
Buying cleaning supplies for my apartment 20.00
Starting UFC pre-drinking at 2 pm 15.00
Eating Lunch and Dinner 15.00
Also with more time on my hands I would’ve asked my friend Phil to watch UFC at Edgewater Casino instead of the bar close to the track, after UFC I would’ve played poker there and probably lost about 300.00
Cab ride home from Casino 15.00

SUNDAY

Expensive Brunch with jerk friends $25
Ceasars to get over hangover $20
Renting Season 2 of Sex and the City 12.00 (by this point I don’t need someone to rent it for me)
Bottle of Wine at off-sales because liquor stores are closed 20.00

Therefore If I was not at track my pocket would have 483.50 less dollars, instead I earned 338.70

Meaning my value spent at the track was worth $822.20 and that is my VOTST rating for this weekend

DEGEN – RATE Index calculation revealed next later